He (or she) drags at home, does not participate in family life and even less on housework, drags his clothes, does not rid its cover, claims or demands, always, ever more consumer object without considering the reality of family resources, school work is poor and the idea of working gives him a cold sweat, he even sometimes be disrespectful ... no doubt, your child is a difficult teenager!
What happens in the head of a difficult teenager?
- All teenagers seek their place at a time of life when the little man is no longer a child but not quite yet an adult.
- Arise in opposition is one common answers chosen by them to build and prepare to enter the adult world.
- Paradoxically, it is when they need it most they want to get rid of any rules of any authority and above all the codes that society has to offer. They want above all "rebels".
- This desire for emancipation through construction and sharing in "tribes" that have their own dress codes or language, but also behavioral (smoking, alcohol, drugs, violence ...).
Understanding for better acting
- When the situation is beyond the scope of the crisis of teen classic - even a little high - it is essential to elucidate the psychological mechanisms or psychopathological susceptible to report difficulties.
- Understanding these mechanisms is essential not only for professionals who support this type of teenagers but also parents whose parenting is highly mistreated.
- Social causes can often be legitimately invoked, they do not explain everything,and especially not the reasons for which drift finished by anchored in the daily of the teenager, especially in the case of violent behavior and delinquency.
What to do when you're a parent of a difficult teenager?
- Provide benchmarks. Even if the teenager dream rebel, he needs benchmarks and an adult at his sides to guide him.
- Replace the parent by "buddy," the parent “educator "! It's never good to mix genres, or too late to reprise his role as educator. The relation parent-child must maintain the ability to draw up legitimate prohibited. A parent is a guide, a friend, an accomplice.
- Give the example. Setting an example is one of the most effective ways to establish the legitimacy of an authority. It should therefore never act like you can blame the teen to do sometimes: at home, in car, in a shop, in the street, with other ...
- In extreme cases, the use of professionals is essential. Psychologists psychiatrists, special educators, association of parent support (School parents, for example) can articulate the educational with the psychological, and sometimes even with the psychiatric.